What Happens When a Walking Tank Meets a Steppe Missile Launcher?

A deep dive comparing medieval European knights and Mongol horse archers in training, strategy, and battlefield performance.

INTRO — A Matchup Made in Historical Chaos

A medieval knight is basically a refrigerator with anger issues strapped to a horse.

A Mongol horse archer is a guided missile launcher with legs and caffeine dependency.

Both dominated their respective worlds.
Both terrified their enemies.
But they never met in a true, full-scale showdown.

So today we’re doing what medieval Europe thankfully never had to:
simulate the most cursed crossover battle in history.

To decide who wins, we need to compare:

• training

• armor

• weapons

• horses

• battlefield tactics

• logistics

• and actual historical performance

And yes, we’re doing it in the signature HistoryGoneBananas blend of semi-serious and semi-silly.